Featured Image for Week 4: Actively Recognizing our Children's Efforts

Week 4: Actively Recognizing our Children's Efforts

Wednesday, September 18, 2019

We discussed last week the act of a child resetting. A child’s reset provides us the opportunity to set rules and actively recognize desired behaviors. Resetting can also be applied to oneself.

We recognize our children's intensity. "Intensity is not bad. it’s life force. It drives all of us. We wouldn't be able to accomplish a thing without it. It powers and empowers life. It fuels our dreams and passions. Without it, we might not even be able to get out of bed." -Glasser

The intense child can channel these energies into behaviors that can be a trigger for us.

This week lets practice resetting on ourselves.

As parents, we can at times, mistakenly give them upside down. “I see that you are working on your homework, however it needs to be more neater, cant’ really understand your hand writing.”

We need to be mindful of our own buttons and or triggers.  

Steps for Self-Resetting

  1. Be aware of your triggers, (what sets you off), for example: last min homework assignments, socks in the middle of the floor, snack packaging left on the sofa.
  2. Before reacting, Pause, take a deep breath. Ask yourself how can this be addressed, without feeding into the negative energy?
  3. Address the behaviors without giving in to the negative (Stand 1 Absolutely No!) "John/Amanda, I need these socks to be placed in the Laundry basket." "I need your homework folder as soon as you come home."

By doing this, you are shifting what may in the past have been negative energy and role modeling clarity, setting expectations and role modelling resetting. They will notice and they will follow!

If you want to hear more, watch the “Intro to Nurtured Heart Approach (Extended)”(26:20) from the Children’s Success Foundation published on Dec 21, 2013

Check the Community Events Calendar on BergenResourceNet to watch for Nurtured Heart Approach Parent Trainings coming up near you!

 

If you missed the prior week's tip:

Week 1: Smoothing Transitions Back to School using the Nurtured Heart Approach

Week 2: Clarity of Rules: A Perspective on Positive Rules and Saying "No"

Week 3: Three Stands to Flip Energy, Create Time-In, and Reset

 

 

Spanish version

A medida que continuamos estableciendo nuestra rutina escolar semanal; siguiendo el camino y creando éxito al reconocer activamente los esfuerzos de nuestros hijos. Discutimos la semana pasada el acto de reiniciar. El restablecimiento nos brinda la oportunidad de establecer reglas, al reconocer activamente los comportamientos deseados. El restablecimiento también se puede aplicar a uno mismo. Reconocemos la intensidad de nuestros hijos. "La intensidad no es mala. Es la fuerza vital. Nos impulsa a todos. No podríamos lograr algo sin ella. La intensidad es vida. Alimenta nuestros sueños y pasiones. Sin ella, ni siquiera podríamos ser capaces . de levantarse de la cama ".

Esta semana practiquemos restablecernos a nosotros mismos.

Como padres, a veces podemos, por error, dar energía al revés. Necesitamos tener en cuenta de nuestros propios botones y/o . que cosas or asuntos nos activa de manera negativa .

Pasos para el reinicio automático

1. Tenga en cuenta sus factores por la qual nos activa or nos affectan negativamente, acignaciones de tarea de último momento, calcetines en el medio del piso, contestar, or ignorer nuestra dirreciones.

2. Antes de reaccionar, Pausa, respira hondo. Pregúntese cómo se puede dirrigir esto, sin alimentar la energía negativa.

3. Reconosca los comportamientos sin ceder ante lo negativo (Posición 1 ¡Absolutamente no!) "John / Amanda, necesito que coloquen estos calcetines en la cesta de la ropa". "Necesito tu carpeta de tarea al entrar a la casa".

Al hacer esto, puede guiar a los jóvenes en Restablecer. Se darán cuenta que son reconocidos por su grandeza! y ellos te seguirán!